Many years ago I noticed a neighbour’s fingers looked weird. Just days before I had come across “nail clubbing” on wikipedia as a symptom of lung disease. Her nails looked exactly like that. Not being a doctor I didn’t have the heart to tell her this could be a sign of a serious disease and that she should go and see a doctor…I don’t know why I didn’t say anything. I really should have. We lost touch, but a while later I heard she was diagnosed with lung cancer and shortly thereafter died from it because it had been discovered too late.
I feel so guilty. Had I told her to see a doctor she probably would have been diagnosed earlier and still be alife today. I feel like I am responsible for her death.
What does Sikhi say about this, how do I deal with guilt? It’s eating me up, I can’t stop thinking about it and feel guilt and shame. Is there anything I can / should do? Other than avoiding being such a coward ever again if I see a situation where I need to say something. I am ashamed of my cowardice but it’s so hard for me to muster the courage to speak up even today, many years later, but it is definitely something I am working on these days. I need to learn to live with it I guess. But how?
I am not a Sikh (I don’t consider myself as a member of any religion but I believe in god) but got in touch with your beautiful religion a few months ago and it has touched my very heart, like coming home, so I would love to hear your advice.