I refer to article “Why children do not listen to parents by Dr Sarbjit Singh”. The question is what is meant by “children do not listen to parents”? It is the subject of the article but is not defined in the article. It was expected that the author should start by explaining this (i.e. the problem under investigation). Can the author now through this question explain by what is meant by “children do not listen to parents” with examples.
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Children normally misbehave when their natural requirements are not being met. The purpose of the article/book was to know “Why children do not listen to parents” and their solutions. This is related with the full development of the child to become Sachyaar. There can be unlimited number of reasons varying from the child to child. The reasons can be that the child is:
Not following the advice of parents, Misbehaving, Non cooperation
Getting irritated, Crying,
Not keeping the things in proper place, throwing the things,
Habits of seeing the TV or mobile,
Getting bribed
Not paying attention to his/her studies,
Ignoring the warning calls
Etc,
Please go through the following book for the further details and clarifications.
http://www.geocities.ws/sarbjitsingh/BookWhyChildrenDoNotListen.pdf,
http://www.sikhmarg.com/pdf-files/book-children-listen.pdf
Thanks for the information you sent via the links. I noted that your article is essentially an English version of that Punjabi version at the links provided albeit condensed. In your reply to my question you have essentially stated the parent perspective of why child does not listen. I would like to state that children claim that “parents don’t listen to them”. Have you thought about this? I have referred to the internet and read some articles on this matter.
LINK: https://www.edarabia.com/reasons-children-dont-listen-parents/
LINK: https://www.aha-now.com/10-reasons-your-kids-dont-listen-to-you/
The points covered in this article are primarily to do with parents.
• Parents talk without getting attention of the child
• Parents speak in a loud tone
• Parents use words child does not like
• Parents lecture child
• Parents compel the child
• Parents repeat reminders and requests
• Parents are not good role models
• Parents should at child when child does not listen
• Parents have unresolved issues with child
• Child may have medical condition
You do not seem to address the issue from the perspective of the child. Why not?
I also note you have attempted to use Gurbani to explain the situation. This I will address this in more detail through further questions.
Please go through the following book. Most of the points have already been covered.
http://www.geocities.ws/sarbjitsingh/BookWhyChildrenDoNotListen.pdf
On my questions
• why you do not address the dot points I listed and
• why you do not address the issue from the child’s perspective.
You asked me the look into your booklet. I could not find where you addressed these. Kindly point to the parts where you address these.
Thank you.
ਸੋ ਪੜਿਆ ਸੋ ਪੰਡਿਤੁ ਬੀਨਾ ਗੁਰ ਸਬਦਿ ਕਰੇ ਵੀਚਾਰੁ ॥ ਅੰਦਰੁ ਖੋਜੈ ਤਤੁ ਲਹੈ ਪਾਏ ਮੋਖ ਦੁਆਰੁ ॥ (੬੫੦)
It seems based on the verse, you blame the problem to be that the parents claim to be religious but are not and merely perform rituals. What evidence is there of this?
In absence of evidence how did you arrive at this conclusion? Further what evidence is there that parents who are REALLY religious … how can one measure if someone is religious or not? What is your measure of a parent being religious?
Now to the verse. The verse is stating that a wise person will CONTEMPLATE Gurbani. The real CRUX of the Shabad from which you quote the verse is that the problem is, one is engrossed in CORRUPTION, EGO, LOVE OF MAYA (ਦੂਜੈ). The solution the Shabad proposed is (1) CONTEMPLATE the Shabad and (2) recite NAAM and the GOAL is SALVATION (ਮੋਖ ਦੁਆਰੁ).
The verse and the Shabad has nothing to do with religious formalities/rituals which you seem to interpret. If at all the child should be taught about ills of CORRUPTION/ EGO/ LOVE OF MAYA, which have nothing to do with religious formalities. How did you arrive at your conclusion from the verse?
Please read the line before the Shabad along with that Shabad. We have to carry out research with the help of Gurbani written in Guru Granth Sahib (Shabad Vichar) and not the ritual formalities.
The parameter of judging as religious is very easy. Please compare with the each and every sentence of Gurbani written in Guru Granth Sahib and evaluate yourself.
Thanks for your response. I studied as you advised.
In your write out before the Verse ਸੋ ਪੜਿਆ … you stated I quote:
“Most of us just perform the rituals only. Very rarely we introspect to find out, whether we are Sikhs or just the so-called Sikhs.”
The key message preceding the Verse ਸੋ ਪੜਿਆ … is that “most of us perform rituals because we do not introspect”.
Hence the verse quoted must substantiate this key message i.e. we are ritualistic because we do not introspect.
The verse is interpret as follows … One is educated (ਸੋ ਪੜਿਆ) and is a far-sighted (wise) Pandit (ਸੋ ਪੰਡਿਤੁ ਬੀਨਾ), contemplates (ਕਰੇ ਵੀਚਾਰੁ) the Guru’s Shabad (ਗੁਰ ਸਬਦਿ). That person introspects (ਅੰਦਰੁ ਖੋਜੈ) finds the true essence (ਤਤੁ ਲਹੈ), and finds the Door of Salvation (i.e. find the path to salvation). Essentially meaning “it is through contemplating the Guru’s Shabad one will find the essence and the path to Salvation”.
The verses seem to be talking about one thing which you are portraying to verses to mean something else.
How do you relate the ‘contemplating Gur Shabad, finding true essence and thus the path to salvation’ to ‘being ritualistic because of not introspecting’?
You state “Daily Path we do at such a speed, that we ourselves cannot listen.”
It is hard to appreciate that one cannot hear what one is reading. When one reads Bani it is pertinent one will end up hearing.
What speed do you propose that we should read daily path? How do you know the speed is correct?
You say “Even the present day language which we speak to our children is different from the language used in Guru Granth Sahib.”
As for the languages in Guru Granth Sahib I have done some research in this area. I quote Macauliffe as follows:
“Judaism has its Old Testament ; Islam its Quran; Hinduism its Veds, Purans, and Shastars ; Budhism its Tripitaka ; the Parsi religion its Zendavesta ; and Confucianism its Analects, its Spring and Autumn, its Ancient Poems and its Book of Changes. The languages in which the holy writings of these religions are enshrined, though all difficult, are for the most part homogeneous, and after preliminary study with tutors can generally be mastered by the aid of grammars and dictionaries ; but not so the mediaeval Indian dialects in which the sacred writings of the Sikh Gurus and Saints were composed. Hymns are found in Persian, mediaeval Prakrit, Hindi, Marathi, old Panjabi, Multani, and several local dialects. In several hymns the Sanskrit and Arabic vocabularies are freely drawn upon. … … Moreover, there are words in the Sikh sacred writings which are peculiar to them, and cannot be traced to any known language.”.
And Gurcharan Singh Talib:
Gurcharan Singh Talib, in his introduction, indicates that Sri Guru Granth Sahib has Punjabi and Old Hindi (with a mixture of philosophical terminology derived from Sanskrit on the one hand and Persian and Arabic in the current folk forms on the other) as equal major languages [1]. In addition to this are included minor part of dialects of northern India, particularly Rajastani Dingal, Sindhi and occasionally Haryanavi may be found used. The Bhaktas (Bhagats) employed predominantly the idiom of the respective regions. Some Sanskrit (actually a derivation of Sanskrit) has also been used.
So it becomes clear that SGGS is composed in so many languages unknown to an ordinary Sikh on the street. It is hard to read a shabad and truly understand it on the go unless time is spent to contemplate and study the Shabad/Verses/Bani.
Do you propose that we speak to our children in all these languages? I fail to understand how this is related to the issue stated in the title.