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Home/ Questions/Q 258482
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Asked: May 3, 20252025-05-03T19:28:41+00:00 2025-05-03T19:28:41+00:00In: Sikh Culture

How do i Fix Seemingly Negative Personality

Anonymous
Anonymous

I am a wheatish brown colored male. My Voice is very deep and tone sounds harsh and rude no matter how hard I try ( I already sound like a man in 50s). I have a natural frown on my forehead, don’t really have good face features (round cheeks etc.)

Whenever I start a conversation, people already make up their mind that I have a bad personality and they start the conversation with that attitude accordingly.

I try to do Paath daily as much as possible. I am a calm person

I have never even gotten into any verbal fights, let alone physical.

But why do I end up giving such vibe that I am not a good person and
How do I Fix that?

Plz help, as it getting really difficult merging in Gurmukh society.

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    1. ਕੁਲਵਿੰਦਰ ਸਿੰਘ
      ਕੁਲਵਿੰਦਰ ਸਿੰਘ
      2025-05-03T20:15:54+00:00Added an answer on May 3, 2025 at 8:15 pm

      It seems that you have a complex that you have a negative personality, which actually may not be so. You yourself say that you, do Paath, are a calm person and do not get into verbal or physical fights. These are signs of a positive personality.

      So, please get rid of the negative complex and be your natural self. Simply don’t bother about what others think of you.

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    2. hkandola
      hkandola Scholar
      2025-05-05T20:37:21+00:00Added an answer on May 5, 2025 at 8:37 pm

      You may benifit reading this short article.IDEAS IN YOUR HEAD CONTROL YOUR WORLD.
      Every human being desire peace, happiness and joy in life. This is directly correlated to quality of thoughts, ideas, SANSKARS in our head. Guru says EH MANN JESSA SEWAHE TESSA HOWAHE TEHE KARAM KAMAE (SGGS page 755) meaning the kind of thoughts, ideas, emotions we internalize in our subconscious mind, we become who we are. And so are the behavior, actions, deeds that we do. AAP BEEJ AAPE HEE KHAWNA KEHNNA KICHH NA JAE. This is the law of nature that we face consequences of our actions here and now. This cannot be disputed or denied. This means ego centered, negative, harmful and unhelpful thoughts bring pain, worries, anxiety, stress, and unhappiness in life. The positive, Guru perspective thoughts bring peace, happiness and joy. As humans we have freedom, control what kind of thoughts we put in our subconscious mind.
      How then do we transform our thoughts to be positive? Guru says AWGUN CHHOD GUNNA KAU DHAWOH (SGGS PAGE 598) meaning renounce vices, negative thoughts and seek godly virtues, positive thoughts in life. The challenge is to align our thoughts to the mind of the Guru as Satpal Singh discussed in living with wisdom.
      Here is an example of how we can transform our thoughts and experience peace, happiness and joy in life. Guru says NA KO BARRY NAHEE BEGANA SAGA SANG HUM KO BAN AYEE (SGGS PAGE 1299) meaning no one in this whole world is stranger, other or my enemy. Whole humanity is my own. EK NOOR TE SABH JUG OPJIA KAUN BHALE KO MANDE (SGGS PAGE 1349) meaning whole of humanity come from one source, THE ONNESS. How can we label some good and others bad. This is the mind of the Guru we need to become.
      I can share my personal experience that when I aligned my mind with mind of the Guru, as discussed above, I have completely stopped labeling, judging others being bad, toxic, negative and irritating. Anger, resentment, frustration and conflicts come from judging others. This state of mind is the cause of pain and suffering in our relationships.
      I have learned from the Guru to accept others who and the way they are. It means when my partner, friend and others act negatively, misbehave and are toxic do not create anger, frustration, resentment and stress for me. I react but with calm and stable state of mind. Negative thoughts do not cross my mind. When these do, I can be able to recognize and drop immediately. Yes, I may decide to stay away from some people but with no resentment. Easy said than done, but so true. Please share your experiences for the benefit of others.

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    3. hkandola
      hkandola Scholar
      2025-05-05T20:37:36+00:00Added an answer on May 5, 2025 at 8:37 pm

      You may benifit reading this short article.IDEAS IN YOUR HEAD CONTROL YOUR WORLD.
      Every human being desire peace, happiness and joy in life. This is directly correlated to quality of thoughts, ideas, SANSKARS in our head. Guru says EH MANN JESSA SEWAHE TESSA HOWAHE TEHE KARAM KAMAE (SGGS page 755) meaning the kind of thoughts, ideas, emotions we internalize in our subconscious mind, we become who we are. And so are the behavior, actions, deeds that we do. AAP BEEJ AAPE HEE KHAWNA KEHNNA KICHH NA JAE. This is the law of nature that we face consequences of our actions here and now. This cannot be disputed or denied. This means ego centered, negative, harmful and unhelpful thoughts bring pain, worries, anxiety, stress, and unhappiness in life. The positive, Guru perspective thoughts bring peace, happiness and joy. As humans we have freedom, control what kind of thoughts we put in our subconscious mind.
      How then do we transform our thoughts to be positive? Guru says AWGUN CHHOD GUNNA KAU DHAWOH (SGGS PAGE 598) meaning renounce vices, negative thoughts and seek godly virtues, positive thoughts in life. The challenge is to align our thoughts to the mind of the Guru as Satpal Singh discussed in living with wisdom.
      Here is an example of how we can transform our thoughts and experience peace, happiness and joy in life. Guru says NA KO BARRY NAHEE BEGANA SAGA SANG HUM KO BAN AYEE (SGGS PAGE 1299) meaning no one in this whole world is stranger, other or my enemy. Whole humanity is my own. EK NOOR TE SABH JUG OPJIA KAUN BHALE KO MANDE (SGGS PAGE 1349) meaning whole of humanity come from one source, THE ONNESS. How can we label some good and others bad. This is the mind of the Guru we need to become.
      I can share my personal experience that when I aligned my mind with mind of the Guru, as discussed above, I have completely stopped labeling, judging others being bad, toxic, negative and irritating. Anger, resentment, frustration and conflicts come from judging others. This state of mind is the cause of pain and suffering in our relationships.
      I have learned from the Guru to accept others who and the way they are. It means when my partner, friend and others act negatively, misbehave and are toxic do not create anger, frustration, resentment and stress for me. I react but with calm and stable state of mind. Negative thoughts do not cross my mind. When these do, I can be able to recognize and drop immediately. Yes, I may decide to stay away from some people but with no resentment. Easy said than done, but so true. Please share your experiences for the benefit of others.

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    4. Ramneet
      Ramneet Scholar
      2025-05-14T16:00:43+00:00Added an answer on May 14, 2025 at 4:00 pm

      You need to accept yourself first, as the Divine has made you. When we are comfortable in our skin, we send positive vibes into the universe, and here it makes all the difference.

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